Little Dog: Hey, where’d everybody go?
Me: They went to bed.
Little Dog: I’m bored.
Me: I don’t know what to tell you.
Little Dog: What are you doing?
Me: I’m watching the Great British Baking Show.
Little Dog: In the middle of the night.
Little Dog: Is it live or something?
Me: This season first aired four years ago.
Little Dog: So not live.
Little Dog: Did I mention I’m bored?
Me: Sounds like you need a hobby.
Little Dog: Great idea!
Little Dog: Maybe I could get into chewing power cords. As a hobby.
Me: Yeah, no.
Little Dog: You’re right. I’ve already reached the top of my cord-chewing game. There’s nowhere left to go, really.
Me: Best stop while you’re ahead.
Little Dog: I also enjoy disemboweling Z’s stuffed animals.
Little Dog: Or we could share a hobby. For example, we could watch cooking shows. In the middle of the night.
Me: It’s a baking show.
Little Dog: It could be a thing we do together is all I’m saying.
Z: Mommy? Is that you out there?
Me: Z, what are you doing up?
Z: I had to use the bathroom. Why are you awake?
Me: I’m watching a baking show.
Little Dog: It’s our new thing.
Z: You don’t bake, mommy.
Me: I could start.
Z: If you don’t go to bed, you’ll get sick.
Me: I’m okay.
Z: It’s not good for you.
Me: You’re right, little rabbit.
Z: Someone should make you go to bed.
Me: Go back to sleep now.
Z: Will you go to bed if I go to bed?
Z: Do you promise?
Me: I promise.
Z: Goodnight, Mommy.
Me: Goodnight, Z.
Little Dog: So staying up late is bad for you?
Me: That’s just a thing I tell the kid.
Little Dog: And someone should make you go to bed?
Me: Why are you still here?
Little Dog: Because things are looking up.
Me: How’s that?
Little Dog: I think I just found my new hobby. And, bonus! It’s something we can do together.
*For more on Little Dog’s new hobby, check out Little Dog Escalates.